The teenage years are known to be full of various
behavioral dimensions. They tend to be experimental and impressionable. They
become adventurous and at extreme cases get quite rebellious. Parents tend to
complain so much about their dos and don'ts and some strange behavioural
patterns. They also exhibit tendencies of wanting to spend so much time with
their friends and if not with the right kind of company, they tend to get
caught up in terrible peer pressure.
Teenagers are known to be young adolescents between age
13-19years. At the stage of their lives they are actually going through some
hormonal developmental stages. They tend to begin to become aware of the
opposite sex and therefore develop feelings for them. In summary, they grow
quite fast at this stage of their lives.
Teenagers are mostly misunderstood at this stage for
obvious reasons but when properly engaged in their line of interest, tend to be
very productive. But sometimes, they tend to be overly rude, lie, sulk,
disobey, and rebellious.
How then can bad behavioral pattern in teenagers be
avoided/corrected and not appear to be too controlling?
1. Set certain rules and standards: when you set certain
boundaries and standards for them with penalties, they tend to stay in track.
Moreover, making them set the penalty for flouting these rules themselves tend
to make them stay within the confines of the rules. You can set a rule that
says, 'when you consecutively break your curfew time thrice, you'll be grounded
for a month.'
2. Put it in writing: write out the rules in black and
white. Sign it and let your teenager sign too, then paste on conspicuous places
in the house. You can paste it on the wardrobe doors, door of the refrigerator,
etc to constantly serve as a reminder to both parties.
3. Be firm and ensure consistency: both parents should
unanimously agree on the implementation of proper discipline to be mete out on
the child when rules have been flouted. When a parent take sides with the
child, proper discipline will not be ensured and the teenage who is a master
manipulator latches on the parent's weakness and gap. So both parents must be
on the same page.
4. Living by example: can you give what you don't have?
Are you a parent who believes in 'do what I say but not what I do'? If you are,
then you may not be able to succeed well in instilling discipline in your
teenager. Both parents must ensure they live a life worth emulating by their
wards. If this is not in place, it will be most likely impossible to preach
discipline and good moral behavior. So parents, uncles, aunties around these
teenagers should live right especially in the presence of these teenagers
because they tend to learn by example.
...it is the wish of every parent to raise role models and cornerstones, what other ways do you think parents can lovingly ensure discipline in their teenagers?